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Take a little ride with me

Barna and WorldVision recently tag-teamed to produce a study called the “The Connected Generation” which documented interviews with more than 15,000 adults ages 18 to 35 in twenty-five countries and nine languages. The research was quite extensive and has been ten years in the making.

As next generation leaders, I think it is vital that we pay attention to a study that offers this much depth. You can look over key findings of the study at this link: https://theconnectedgeneration.com/key-findings/

Of all the information covered, however, the one statistic that I cannot get out of my head is that only one out of every three young adults said they had someone in their life that believed in them.

This statistic literally breaks my heart. I have had countless number of people in my life invest and believe in me. This sad statistic forces me to look in the mirror and ask myself, “Am I believing in someone in the next generation?”

The next generation is often criticized, but if they have no mentors, no coaches, isn’t that somewhat of an indictment on the next generation’s leaders? I think it is.

As this latest study revealed, Millennials and Gen Z aren’t the next generation; they are the now generation! They are not an add-on to the church, but rather an active agent; not a consumer, but rather a contributor.

So, the question becomes, “How are you preparing future leaders for the arts and sciences, for economics and politics, for business and ministry?” Vocational discipleship is extremely important to the next generation and they are looking for coaches and mentors at church. Your job is to help facilitate this new reality: the workplace has become the new church.

This past Sunday, a young man approached me and asked me to mentor him. For starters, I was honored to be asked. It might now work this way for you. You might be the one who needs to ask a young man or woman if you could mentor him or her.

So, how will I mentor this new protege of mine? I have learned the last thing to do is give my mentee a book and tell him to go away. That practice does not do either party any good. You must first start by understanding that mentoring is a way for you to grow as much as your mentee.

So, how will I mentor this new protege of mine? I will take him along for the ride of his life. I will let him do ministry with me. He will do what I do. He will feel what I feel. He will see what I see and he will hear what I hear.

Wasn’t this the way of Jesus? Didn’t he tell some guys to come and follow him? Really, what Jesus told his disciples was “come and take a walk with me.” But, this was no short walk. This was a journey, a day-by-day walk beside Jesus and trusting him that he was taking them exactly where they needed to go. For one disciple, it led to the most unexpected place-hanging on a cross, upside-down. Thank goodness Jesus did not tell Peter this news on Day 1. This ride may not always be fun, but it will be worth giving up your very life for.

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The Next Generation and the First Generation

In Bible times, it was normal to define older men/women and younger men/women in one or two different ways: (1) Older men/women were above the age of 40 and younger men/women were under the age of 40, or (2) Older men/women were above the age of 60 and younger men/women were above the age of 12. Expectations by God of older and younger men/women were very similar (see Titus 2).

What if we, however, took the first definition and just made all the generations we have today either fit into one generation (those above the age of 40) or the other (those below the age of 40). In that line of thought, I have often wondered, “What would you then call the generation that comes before the next generation?” Though they are older and some may even be approaching death, I think it rude to call the preceding generation the “last generation.” Though they are wiser, “mature generation” just doesn’t sound right either. Though seniors shouldn’t be offended by the word “older” (the Bible considers old age a badge of honor), some are and might not like being called the “older generation” or the “senior generation.”

It is at this point that the words of Jesus enter my mine. I think of when Jesus talked about how the first would be last and the last would be first (Matthew 19:30). I know Jesus was talking about how service and discipleship related to the Kingdom in this verse and not how the generational gap could be bridged. But, there is a principle I have gleaned from Jesus’ statement that helps me answer the above question.

Things usually work backwards in life. Parents often raise their kids in young age only to turn around and have their kids take care of them in their old age. In this way, the last becomes first. When the next generation serves and takes care of those who came before them, they are being Christ-like. When both generations put the other before themselves, the first become last and the last become first. If we live the way Christ told us to, there really is no need for a generational war! Next generation, why not honor the oldest generation by calling them the first or best generation?

My friends from GenOn ministries recently gave me some great advice and ideas for intergenerational ministry. They told me that it is not how the first generation talks to the next generation or even how the next generation talks with the first generation. What it is about is in asking the right questions and having all voices at the table be heard and respected.

With my church’s homecoming coming up, GenOn provided me with a wonderful list of questions that the first generation can ask the next generation. I have since talked with both generations! I asked the first generation to be intentional about approaching the next generation whether that’s by walking up to or sitting down with the next generation. I asked the next generation that when approached by the first generation, they should not run or say hi and bye (one-word answers).

Here’s the list I want to lay down on each table at my church’s homecoming for generational conversations to begin:

  • What is your name? 
  • What grade are you in?
  • Do you play sports and if so, what sports do you play?
  • Are you involved in band or drama at school?
  • Did you go on any fun vacations or trips this past Summer? 
  • What are some of your favorite things to do?
  • What is school like (Tell them how school was for you)?
  • What do you like or love about our church?
  • What is a lesson you have learned at church and how does this lesson help you in your life?
  • What would you say to someone about why you attend this church?
  • What might your role at Mt. Carmel be in the future?
  • What are some ways you connect with God?
  • What are some highs and lows in your life that I can be praying about?
  • How can I pray for you this week?
  • What could our church do better at?
  • What is your favorite hymn/praise song?
  • Are there any other church songs that speak to you?
  • What music style do you connect with?

Keep in mind that what we have done for so long in church is multi-generational ministry, not intergenerational ministry. For too long, we have sat generations together in a room and asked for no interaction between the generations. Generations come and go to church without ever talking to or acknowledging one another. Intergenerational ministry doesn’t work like that! We need both formal and informal experiences where intentional and spontaneous ministry between the generations can take place.

So often, we let education or worship wars divide our generations and our churches. I’m not even talking about the technological gap. It shouldn’t matter if a younger man/woman wants to attend small group in a house instead of Sunday school in a church or if an older man/woman prefers the opposite. What should matter is that both are ministering and being ministered to!

Why do we make such a big deal about worship? Here is how I answered the last three questions on the list: “I can’t say that I have a favorite hymn/praise song. I do like both and my church does both. I don’t like dead worship. When God is being worshipped in spirit and in truth, that is live worship and you feel Him. I think the worship pastor/praise band is instrumental because no matter what he or she/they sing, who they are takes precedence. They may not sing my style of preference but their worship of God is evident and inspires me to worship. So worship goes beyond words. Our worship pastor has led worship for nineteen years and hasn’t got paid a dime. When he leads worship, I know he is truly leading out of his love for Jesus.”

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The Last Generation and Mental Health

As you know, I am always writing about the next generation. This is why I must admit that while reading James Emery White’s book Meet Generation Z, I became awestruck by an idea that Dr. White presents in the book. White says, “Intriguingly, some are calling Generation Z the last generation we will ever speak of. The speed of culture, in which change can happen in a day, will make speaking of generations and their markings obsolete.” White then quotes a Culture Forecast by Sparks and Honey that says, “Tomorrow will be less about what a difference a generation makes, but more about what a difference a day makes.” White then continues, “All the more reason to make sure we know about what is probably the last, and arguably what will prove to be the most influential, generation in Western history.”

Could Gen Z be the final generation? If you are working through the alphabet, it makes sense. I mean, we just went through Generation X, Generation Y, and now Generation Z. I think there is some validity to the concept White proposes. There is no doubt that the years in which comprise a generation are shortening due to technology, the generation gap, and the speed at which society is moving. I like what Daniel 12:4 says: “But you, Daniel, roll up and seal the words of the scroll until the time of the end. Many will go here and there to increase knowledge.” It is no surprise that knowledge has increased and that people are scurrying about. Man, in his rebellion, has always tried to unite in order to reach heights that properly belong to God (e.g., The Tower or Babel in Genesis 11). But does all of this mean that generations will cease to exist? I am not so sure. I am reminded of all the times Jesus spoke of judgments regarding various generations. In the end, I don’t think the answer matters all that much and that any talk about whether Gen Z is the last generation or not is just fanciful speculation at best.

While we are on subjects of dispute, I have to bring up another. In the year 2008, Dr. Robert Leahy posted on Psychology Today this line: “The average high school kid today has the same level of anxiety as the average psychiatric patient in the early 1950’s.” Leahy made this statement based off of research that is now nearly twenty years old. However, with the advent of smart phones and social media in 2007, I think Leahy was onto something. Yet, with such a time lapse between the research, I prefer to lean on one of the leading Gen Z expert’s opinions in analyzing the mental health of youth culture today.

Dr. Jean Twenge, Professor of Psychology at San Diego St. wrote a book called iGen: Why Today’s Super-Connected Kids are Growing up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy-And Completely Unprepared for Adulthood.” Twenge followed up on her book when she recently wrote an article entitled, “The mental health crisis among America’s youth is real – and staggering.”  Twenge has said that it is not an exaggeration to describe iGen or Generation Z as being on the brink of the worst mental health crisis in decades.

In the article, Twenge says, “The large increases in mental health issues in the National Survey on Drug Use and Health appeared almost exclusively among teens and young adults, with less change among Americans ages 26 and over. Even after statistically controlling for the influences of age and year, we found that depression, distress and suicidal thoughts were much higher among those born in the mid- to late-1990s, the generation I call iGen. The mental health crisis seems to be a generational issue, not something that affects Americans of all ages. And that, more than anything else, might help researchers figure out why it’s happening.”

The old research says that teens were tripping out because of academic pressure. Academic pressure has only intensified today as kids compete for scholarships, etc. However, I think Twenge is more onto the cause when she says, “But there was one societal shift over the past decade that influenced the lives of today’s teens and young adults more than any other generation: the spread of smartphones and digital media like social media, texting and gaming.”

I agree with the latest research which says mental health is a generational issue. Whereas mental health was a minor issue in the 1950’s, now the issue has blown up to become a normal part of life. In the past, those struggling with mental health were treated as exiles. Today, these same outcasts are embraced and treated with special care. Colleges, in particular, are having to navigate these challenging times by offering their students programs and professionals which can assist them with their mental health. Jim Sankey, SEC Commissioner, recently stated at SEC Media Days, “The perspectives on mental health represent not a ripple of change, but a wave of new reality, which faces all of us in intercollegiate athletics and higher education.” Whereas talk with students used to center around campus parking and textbooks, Sankey says students today need and want to talk about their mental health.

We should help students understand that they need to value the words coming from those who love them like parents, teachers, and coaches more than they do the words coming from their Twitter followers or other social media outlets.

How are you helping this generation deal with mental health issues? There is no better place to start than the Bible. This verse comes to mind: “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7, NKJV).

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Share Jesus – YEET?

Summers were made for movies! I recently went to watch the new release Spider Man: Far From Home. One scene in particular caught my attention. Two teenagers who just started dating are sitting beside each other on a bus. The couple is wrapped is up in their own little world because each is looking down playing on their phone. But then the teenage boy gets a text from his girlfriend that says “I miss you.” Without looking up or to the side (where his girlfriend is sitting), the boy replies back with a text that says, “I miss you too.”

Marvel has a way of displaying culture in a humorist way, but Marvel does this in a way that is also realistic. We laugh because we know the scene we are watching is real. The next generation has always had a fascination with themselves. Really, its just part of human nature. But with the advent of smart phones, it appears that the next gen’s preoccupation with themselves is now on steroids.

Not only does Gen Z speak a different language than everyone else (watch the above video), I am afraid Gen Z is losing the battle on knowing how to communicate with real people in a face to face conversation. It really isn’t a bad idea to offer the next generation a workshop on communication skills. The motive behind any workshop you offer should be the gospel. Sure, Gen Z is better with reaching Gen Z for Jesus online than older generations. But I still think there is value in Gen Z learning how to communicate the gospel face to face. Life is a balance and for the moment, life isn’t lived in a completely digital world.

Leaders, we must lead the way if we want the the next generation to learn how to share Jesus with others in a non-digital way. For example, I recently heard of a summer camp that asked for all of its students who received Christ to text in that they had made this all-important decision. What are we really communicating to our students when all we ask of them is to text us that they made the most important decision they ever could make in their life? The decision to follow Christ for the rest of one’s life should be a public declaration, not merely a set of private texts sent between two parties. After all, Jesus was publicly humiliated for our sin. He didn’t accomplish his work on the cross in a single text, tweet, or post. I think we owe Jesus more, but again leaders, that starts with you and I leading the way.

Let’s teach our students how to have out-loud conversations, how to communicate the gospel online and off-line, and that their faith should be public. At the same time, let’s learn the language of Gen Z so we can better speak into their lives!

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Somebody’s Watching Me

When leading a Student D-Group, an excellent tool to have in your bag of resources is a list of accountability questions. Christ-followers of all ages are responsible for keeping their brothers and sisters (in Christ) in check.

Taken from a combination of many sources, below is a list of accountability questions Student D-Group Leaders can ask students every week in their weekly D-Group meeting!

Pride

  1. Have you consciously or unconsciously created the impression that you are better than you are?
  2. Have you secretly wished for another’s misfortune so that you might excel?

Family

3. Are you giving your family only your emotional table scraps?

Above Reproach & Blameless

4. Have you exposed yourself to any sexually alluring material or allowed your mind to entertain inappropriate thoughts about someone of the opposite sex?

5. Have you done anything that compromised your integrity with the opposite sex?

Spiritual Disciplines

6. Are you faithfully involved with worship and service?

7. Are you giving time for the Bible to speak to you every day?

8. Are you enjoying prayer every day?

9. Is Christ real to you?

Self-Control

10. Are you a slave to work, hobbies, or your phone?

11. Is your pace of life sustainable?

12. Do you go to bed on time and get up on time?

13. Are you taking care of your body through physical exercise, proper eating, and sleeping habits?

Relationships & Anger

14. Have you allowed a person or circumstance to rob you of joy?

15. Is there anyone whom you fear, dislike, disown, criticize, hold resentment toward, or disregard? If so, what are you doing about it?

16. Have you damaged another person by your words, either behind their back or face-to-face?

17. Have you passed on to another what was told to you in confidence?

Evangelism

18. When was the last time you spoke to someone about your faith?

Money

19. Are you praying about the money you spend?

Accountability

20. Do you have anything that you desire to keep secret?

21. Have you lied on any of your answers?

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Free E-Course

Christian Formation, Ministry, and Leadership

Madonna once sang the lyrics, “We are living in a material world.” I feel like I am living in the digital world. Technology has disrupted every industry, including the field of education.

I am proud to announce (on this Holy Week) that I am releasing a FREE eCourse on my blog site entitled “Christian Formation, Ministry, and Leadership.” You can locate the course on the far right tab found on the home page. You may be asking yourself, “What is an eCourse?” An eCourse is simply a class you take online. Many instructors charge students to take their eCourse. The good news for you, as it relates to this course, is you won’t be taking any tests and the good news for me is I won’t be grading any papers!

After I graduated seminary with my doctorate, I put together a series of lectures that relate to subjects of Christian formation, ministry, and leadership. I love all three of these fields and thus enjoyed compiling these lectures. If you do not have a passion for these three fields like I do, I can assure you that you will most likely not enjoy listening to my lectures.

However, if you do enjoy Christian formation (what I term as a combination of Christian education and spiritual formation), ministry, and leadership, I think you will like my lectures. You may only like one or two of the disciplines. If that is the case, I would encourage you to pick and choose which lectures you will listen to. For example, if you are a business leader, you may only want to listen to the lecture on leadership. If you are an adult pastor, you may want to listen to the lecture on adult ministry and the lecture on leadership. If you want to learn more about ministry in general, I think you will find yourself listening to many of these lectures!

I hope you enjoy listening to these lectures and I hope you find my lectures worthwhile of your time.

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New Booklet!

WHY NGM?

My latest booklet WHY NGM? has just been released on Amazon in print and digitally through Kindle! I should have published this booklet first. WHY? Because your “why” comes before your “what” or your “how.” Simon Sinek, the business guru, who wrote Start With Why is to be credited with discovering this principle. Starting with “why” doesn’t just work in business; it also works in ministry!

You may notice that what I once called “books,” I now call “booklets.” The reason I have changed terminology is because of none of my “books” were long. I find it more accurate to describe my writing’s as booklets. I also think that people do not read as much as people used to read and I know that people’s attention spans have shrunk. I believe people are much more likely to read my booklet than than they are to read my book.

It is time for me to get off of my soapbox and get back to telling you WHY I wrote this booklet. I had no intention to write a new booklet. However, I found myself hitting a roadblock. I knew I needed to do something to get my juices flowing! After seeking the Lord, I knew I needed to write this new booklet. However, I had no idea where I was going.

What I did know was that WHY NGM? was to serve a tri-fold purpose: (1) To encourage student pastors that were hurting, (2) To help ministers who had lost their way, and (3) To explain why next generation ministry is needed in the local church.

The first and second purposes go together. Many ministers who are hurting have lost their way. They have lost their “why.” I am amazed at the number of student pastors who are hurting and at the number of ministers (any type of pastor) who have lost their way. God has given me a heart for helping hurting ministers, especially student pastors.

The third purpose speaks to student pastors and ministers (specifically, pastors) who need to understand why converting to next generation ministry, a new model of student ministry, is important.

What ends up coming out of the booklet is even a surprise to me! The “why” that jumps off the pages is “to make our nation stronger.” I am not saying this “why” is the most important “why” found in next generation ministry. All I am saying is that even I was surprised how forcefully this “why” surfaces. I never sat down and began writing this booklet thinking of how much I was going to highlight our nation. It is just what happened.

That being said, I do believe next generation ministry makes a family, a church, and a nation stronger! If you would like to know more about next generation ministry, please read all of my booklets. I promise you they are short!

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Unravel

Chances are you have not heard the song above. If you have happened to hear the song on piano or guitar (or both), chances are you do not know the words of the song or even that the song had words.

The next generation is extremely talented! But sometimes they are saying things to us without saying them. Are you tuned into what they are saying even when they are not saying anything aloud? Just because some in the next gen may not talk does not mean they do not possess depth. It may just mean you need go deeper to tap into the vast wealth they do possess.

How can you tap into this wealth and help your students use it to influence the world for Christ. You must first spend time with your students. As you learn who your students are and what talents they possess, you will be well on your way in helping them to release their full potential.

The next generation are not a people to be managed. Rather, they are a resource to be developed! How are you investing in them? Are you a mentor or a micromanager? Level 2 won’t be achieved until have completed level 1. It doesn’t help to skip steps. Once the next gen sees you care, they will allow you to help them with the details of their life. This includes the spiritual disciplines and associated accountability they need to incorporate into their own Christian development. This is when and where you come in! In this way, their hurts become your help.

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Who am I?

J.D. Greear – God as Trinity – GO Conference 2019

“Who am I?” is a question the next generation has always asked of themselves. I’ve said this before, but I think the topic of gender identity will be of great concern for the church in the ages to come. However, putting aside gender identity, people have always struggled with finding out who they are.

It’s never been wrong to try and figure out who you are. The problem is most people try to accomplish this feat aside from God. You will never figure out who you are until you figure out who you are in Christ. In Christ, you are a new creation. In Christ, you are a son or daughter of God. In Christ, you are a child of God. In Christ, your sins are removed as far as the east is from the west. In Christ, you are the righteousness of God.

If someone is not in Christ, they may be physically alive, but according to the Bible, they are dead and lost in their trespasses. It makes sense that you can’t know who you are until you know who you are in Christ (that is, if Jesus really is God). Apart from your Creator, how can you, the created, figure out anything, much less anything so complex as the subject of who you are.

JD Greear, Pastor of the The Summit Church, recently spoke at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary’s GO Conference on “God as Father” and how that relates to one’s identity. I have never heard a greater address on the subject. Listening to the sermon in its entirety will be well worth your time. Simply click on the link above and be encouraged!

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The Value of Commitment

I recently shared some of the content in this post with my youth before Valentine’s Day: Ever been stood up for a date? I have. It is one of the worst feelings known to man. A double-minded man (or woman) is unstable in all his (or her) ways. If someone tells you, “Yes, I’ll be there” or “Yes, I’ll do that,” you expect that someone to be a person of their word. I know the hand-shake and “word is your bond” is all but gone in our society, but right is still right and wrong is still wrong.

Whenever you make a decision, you must first decide what decision you are going to make. In other words, you must weigh the options, analyze the pros and cons of all decisions on the table, and most importantly, pray about the decision you are making. Joining a D-Group or following Jesus is a huge decision. Your students are not just agreeing to meet with you for a year. They are agreeing to start their own D-Group after your year’s worth of meetings. Your students are agreeing to be discipled and to be a disciple-maker! Jesus had something to say on the matter (Luke 14:25-34). First, count the costs and then make the decision (in this case, surrender to His will).

When asked to do something, it’s ok to say no. Make sure your students know this. However, it’s not ok to say yes and then say no (Matt. 5:37). I recently worked seven days in a row without a day off. A couple of weeks before my loaded work week, a person had asked me to attend his event. I told the person I would be at his event. The problem was the person’s event was on my eighth day without rest. I didn’t want to go and didn’t feel like going, but I went because I said I would be there. In other words, I was committed. Discipleship works the same way. When you offer students an opportunity to join your D-Group, it is ok if they say no. But if or when a student quits a D-Group they committed to, the team is affected for the worse. This is why D-Groups often sign a group covenant before they begin. I have adapted Robby Gallaty’s adult D-Group Covenant into a Student D-Group Covenant below:

DISCIPLESHIP COVENANT

I will commit to the following expectations: 

I pledge myself fully to the Lord with the anticipation that I am entering a time of accelerated spiritual transformation. 

I will meet with my D-Group for approximately one hour every week, unless providentially hindered. 

I will complete all assignments on a weekly basis before my D-Group meeting, in order to contribute to the discussion. 

I will contribute to an atmosphere of confidentiality, honesty, and transparency for the edification of others in the group as well as my own spiritual growth. 

I will pray every week for other students who are on the discipleship journey with me. 

I will begin praying about replicating the discipleship process upon completion of this group. 

Signed Mentee ______________________________________ 

Signed Mentor ______________________________________ 

Date _____________________________ 

I would give a copy of this covenant to the youth’s parent/guardian(s) so that they know what their student is committing to and what they can be praying about/for. 

If you have committed to lead a Student D-Group (and are using my M.A.P.’s Journal), here are some more tips for leading (also read this previous post). First, studying the week’s selected passage using an ESV or CSB study bible is not a bad idea. Your job is not to lecture students (they don’t need or want another bible study), but to facilitate and guide D-Group discussion. However, giving an overview of the passage for the first five minutes is perfectly acceptable.

A friend of mine recently began using MAPS with his student group and says he and his students are loving it. My friend has found this discipleship resource to be practical and direct. Remember, MAPS was designed to be simple and flexible, giving the D-Group leader much freedom in adapting each lesson to meet his or her student’s needs. My friend has adapted the 4 W’s (Who, What, When, Where) into his weekly D-Group meeting. He has his students name who they need to reach out to, what they are going to do, and finally when and where they are going reach out, (i.e., take someone out to ice cream or strike up a conversation in the local gym). Students may not be ready to share the full-out gospel, but any student can take these first steps! Give your students a weekly assignment they are comfortable with and follow up each week.

My last tip for Student D-Group leaders is to teach your students to pray. Like growth in evangelism mentioned above, growing in prayer takes time too. Maybe your students are not ready to pray out loud for every student in their D-Group just yet (It’s awesome hearing yourself prayed for by 3-4 others in your D-Group). Start them out with something simpler such as the ACTS acronym (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication). Perhaps you give your student the outside assignment of asking a believer/unbeliever if that person has anything they can pray for them about. Once your D-Group students have learned to pray for each other’s needs out loud, it is great if prayer takes up 20 minutes of your meeting!

If you need more information or tips on leading D-Groups in general, click here.

Just make sure you’re all-in before you begin!