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Family Worship vs. Worship as Family

Google the words “family worship” and you can discover some great resources that describe what family worship is and the importance (and even requirement) of having family worship. For example, a Ligonier article entitled “Family Worship 101” by William Boekenstein defines family worship as the regular use of Scripture, song, and prayer by a family unit, guided by the head of the household.

Lately, I have been equipping parents with resources to lead their children (including teens) in family devotions. Family devotions is not the same as family worship although family devotions are a form of worship. Family devotions should only last about ten minutes a night. You can find many resources that will help you lead daily devotions for your family. Family worship might also be every night but is a bit lengthier than ten minutes. For instance, some families have been known to have family worship for 30 minutes a night (excluding church days or a once a week family day). Is there a happy medium? I think so! I would suggest families planning a “family night.” Family nights last up to an hour long and incorporate a time to eat, play, study, and pray together. I don’t know of any better resource for family nights than GenOn Ministries “Family ’round the table” curriculum. Family night is definitely family worship!

But should family worship take the place of worship as family? When I say “worship as family,” I mean families attending their weekly congregational worship together. The answer to this question is no! Family worship at home should not take the place of family worship at church or vice versa. Both churches and families should partner together in making disciples of the next generation (Deut 6:6-7, Ps 78:5-7, Acts 2:46; 5:42, Ephesians 6:4, 2 Tim 3:15). This is the way it always has been in the Bible. Family discipleship should take place in the church and in the home. Simply put, families should have a time of worship together at home and in the church. Healthy churches help make healthy homes and healthy homes help make healthy churches!

Fathers or single-parent mothers (as head of the household), let’s be honest. Family worship is often the exception and not the rule. Most families worship at church but family worship at home is found wanting. Donald Whitney has an excerpt in his book, Family Worship which says, “I am persuaded from my own ministry experience in hundreds of churches that so little family worship regularly exists in Christian homes today, that even in our best churches, most of our best men do not even pray with their wives (and children if they have them) much less lead them in ten minutes or so of worship as family . . . God deserves to be worshiped daily in our homes by our families.”

Barna Research echoes Whitney, “Eighty-five percent of parents with children under age 13 believe they have primary responsibility for teaching their children about religious beliefs and spiritual matters. However, a majority of parents don’t spend any time during a typical week discussing religious matters or studying religious materials with their children . . . Parents generally rely upon their church to do all of the religious training their children will receive.”

This atrocious trend of families relying on the church to meet all of its spiritual needs must come to an end. Equally important, ministry leaders must stop trying to do all of the family’s work. Ministry leaders, please equip your families with resources for leading worship at home. Families, as you begin worshipping at home, you will notice that worship at church becomes that much sweeter! And in-turn ministry leader, you will notice your burdens at church becoming lighter (Matt 11:28-30).